All 14 movie Reviews


Banana Phone 2 Banana Phone 2

Rated 5 / 5 stars

TEH GENIUS!!!111

MY EYES TEH GOGGLES DO NOTHING!!111!1



Banana Phone Banana Phone

Rated 5 / 5 stars

Teh Dabe

Teh Dabe was making Teh Portal teh funnay since before Jesus!



Anal Bananal Vol. 1 Anal Bananal Vol. 1

Rated 0.5 / 5 stars

Pure Proof

That Macromedia needs better copy protection.


VanilllaCokeClock responds:

Please write a more constructive review next time.


Max Payne bullettime test Max Payne bullettime test

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

This must be the "Magic Bullet" from the Zapruder

film.

This is good...but in your attempt at a camera angle change...I get more of an impression that the bullet does a near U-turn to hit its target.

Its not bad. Nothing to stop the Portal for...but not bad.



Clock Trek Clock Trek

Rated 3 / 5 stars

This is whats wrong with the Clock Crew

And whats -always- been wrong with it.

The Clocks have turned out much better flash these days..than they did when they were first invading the portal with goatse.cx spam apps and incredibly horrid flash movies of stick figures fucking each other in the ass.

But while the quality has improved, this episode came out of the gates with nearly a 5.00 rating that no one could vote down to put it into its more appropriate range.

And this is because the Clocks inflate each others ratings with level 20 accounts, making it very hard for honest artists to gain the recognition they deserve (Not talking about myself..just in general.).

While I don't find anything really wrong with this submission (except that the story was relatively contrived and uncreative) and it is better than the original content the Clocks were producing a few years ago. Its current rating is going to ensure it a daily top 5....just like any other Clock Crew movie.

Integrity apparently doesn't apply on NG.


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Luigi Revenge Luigi Revenge

Rated 0 / 5 stars

Meh

Ripped sprites, ripped 8 bit game sounds, ripped Matrix spoof.

The only moderately funny thing about this talentless piece of crap was the creators CATS version of english.



how it will end. how it will end.

Rated 4 / 5 stars

Excellent

Do not listen to the reviews of the typical Portal goatboy that think all good portal entries must be Stick Figure Super Saiyans that are brutally decapitating small animals while ass fucking hot anime babes.

This piece of work is awesome, its so stream of consciouness. It kept me watching it all the way to the end, and never once did I say "Why?" or "Where is this going?" the material was all totally unrelated in most ways, but it was still very intellectually humorous.

The stick figure super saiyan fans will just have to enjoy one of the other 4 million portal entries that fit their (lack of) taste.

All my 5's are belong to this.


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Darkstick A Darkstick A

Rated 3.5 / 5 stars

This isn't bad for a stick flick

Nice storyline, the lack of sound really hurts it though.

Needless to say, I generally hate stick figure movies, but I can slide on stick figures when the story is good.

If you get some sound into this its a solid 4 or 5 in my opinion.

Great style really.



The Unknown Threat The Unknown Threat

Rated 1.5 / 5 stars

I'm not harsh

I can't really assume anything on the part of the author, but I'd assume from the art hes young and just getting into movie making.

You do good mood music, and your backdrops are fairly good. The story flows well, but is somewhat unoriginal (but what story is...on the portal afterall.), but then, at the end the only real action scene of the movie is played out in the viewers imagination. Not that theres really any action in any of the other scenes mind you.

I'm going to give this a 2 because at least its not yet another stick figure movie...for which we can thank our respective gods, deities or super egos for, I suppose. And I think the author is making a genuine effort to submit worthwhile, if some what underdeveloped content...which is more than I can say for...oh, about 87% of the portal entries I've seen today.

Keep on plugging away at it. You know where you want to go, and its obviously producing well presented flash epics. Now, just walk the line between this production, and your masterpiece, and you're there.


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bored and useless bored and useless

Rated 0 / 5 stars

TEH POOP

Where is TEH DAVE?

Where is TEH IRC! j00 must contact me and tell me.

MSN angstirae@hotmail.com